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5 Phrases to Make Your Child Feel Better About Bedwetting
Statements That Have a Positive Impact on Your Child
By Donna Smith
Judsen Culbreth, parenting expert and former editor-in-chief of Working Mother and Parent&Child magazines, agrees. "Children have a very fine-tuned sense of shame," she says. "Blaming them for something that isn't their fault can deeply scar them and have a long-lasting effect. Parents need to reassure their children that this isn't something they can control, but there are ways to manage bedwetting." She suggests saying to the child, "Your body isn't ready and it will be at some point – this is just like any other developmental stage, such as loosing teeth."
Freymiller-Hazen feels that children need to be explained why it is not their fault. "Children need a lot of reassurance through this period of time, especially for older children," she says. "Along with this statement it may be beneficial for children to understand the different reasons why children wet (sound sleepers, body growing too quickly, weak sphincter muscle, etc.). Children generally want to please those around them and they may take on more stress if they feel that [it] is their fault."
Scranton agrees with this phrase. "I've come to realize that bedwetting is something that kids just need to mature out of – both physically and sometimes emotionally," she says.
Children are keen on growing, and referencing past examples of growth will help them associate bedwetting with growth and development, Culbreth says. "A parent might say, 'Remember last year when we measured your height and you were only this tall? Now look at you! This will happen with bedwetting too,'" she says.
While it is important for children to realize that their bedwetting will not go on forever, Freymiller-Hazen reminds parents that children grow at different rates. "The amount of time that this problem lasts is different for each child," she says. "This statement helps reiterate that it is not their fault and though they may not have control over how long it lasts, they can control how they deal with it."