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February 17, 2001
2-17-04
Kid’s Say…and Ask…the Craziest Things
OK, so we have a Jonnie-ism. Not the kind he had when he was a toddler and a preschooler, but an older and yet still funny one. This one is rated PG-13.
Ashley (his older sister, 12) and I were both menstruating at the same time. He would have cause to know this as he has to take out all the trash in the house and that includes the bathroom trash. As there are tell-tale signs that someone is using ‘sanitary products’ for anyone stuck taking out the trash, Jonnie was well aware that both his sister and his mother were ‘having their period.’
Jonnie comes up to me and he asks, “Why do girls bleed and boys don’t?”
OK, my first thought was, “Haven’t we covered this one already?” This was followed by, “I guess not…now what do I say to him?” I thought and thought about it and I decided not to explain it all right then and there because we didn’t have the privacy and undivided attention I thought it would require for him to pay attention to the answer and feel free to ask any other follow up questions so I said simply, “Because girls have v*g*n*s and boys don’t.”
He didn’t say anything and it left me to feeling like that wasn’t even an accurate answer so I said, “That’s where the blood comes out. You have to have one to bleed like that. And boys don’t have uteruses. That’s where the blood comes from.” Something like that.
He looks at me for a while and then says, very concerned, “But a person can bleed to death.”
Ready or not…here we go!
OK, to me this was very funny and very sweet at the same time. He was concerned 1) That he never have to worry about bleeding to death himself. (You could tell he was making sure, in part, that he didn’t have this to look forward to in the future.) 2) That his mother and sister were going to be OK. 3) How this whole bleeding process could know who it was supposed to happen to.
So, now I have to have one of ‘those talks’ w/ him here, very soon, to explain it all in a way that will make sense and be completely correct. I am a firm believer in using the correct terms and providing correct information BEFORE they would be exposed to it through ‘daily living.’ I want their first information to come from my viewpoint, w/ my values, and to be completely accurate—not necessarily detailed—so that they don’t get any crazy ideas and so that my values aren’t playing catch up but seem a normal part of sexuality.
I don’t know if I am ready for this! I suppose that could be said for many phases of parenting. (I know I wasn’t ready for Ashley to ‘start’ when she did.)
Not Much Else Up
On the Joshua front, there hasn’t been much lately. I really am not doing as much as I should w/ him owing to the fact that I have started taking this medicine and, while I felt pretty good for about a week, I am ‘cycling’ again. In other words, my body is flushing out the trouble causing elements and during this time I am achy, sore, and tired.
The good news comes when I think of how much more energy I will have to help Joshua and how much better I will be w/ his various treatments come this summer or maybe a little later when I am a much healthier, more energetic person w/ an improved memory. I will be able to be a better mom to all my kids and I look forward to attacking Joshua’s troubles w/ renewed energy when that happens.
As for now, I usually forget his ‘medicines,’ the ones he has to take four times a day at least 30 min. before or after a meal. The timing is just too much for me right now. (These are not rx’s that I am forgetting, but ‘alternative medicines.’) I do usually remember his morning medicines which include a nasal spray for allergies, a liquid vitamin, and DMG pills (which are, themselves, ‘alternative medicine.’) I almost never remember his brushing and compression, which are part of his ‘sensory diet.’
Best wishes,
Khy
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