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April 26, 2003
Jaida Stop/Don’t Do That/Get Down
Those seem to be the only words I say lately. I’ve tried praise and letting her be my helper but that has not worked. Heather R. mentioned that she suspected Jaida had a problem self-regulation and I think she was right. Jaida obviously knows right from wrong but she doesn’t appear to care when she gets on a roll. She climbs and dangles on the furniture. She puts dangerous objects in her mouth. She uses toys as weapons against Jarod. Lately, she enjoys being naked a little too much. While her bathwater is running she will jump on her bed naked or spread-eagle herself in the middle of the hallway. That last one really unnerves me.
When I see her about to do something dangerous like jump off the sofa, I will say, “Jaida don’t do that. DO NOT JUM…” Before the words leave my mouth she is in midair. I’m afraid she will break a leg or something but she laughs and climbs back onto the sofa or chair for another freefall. If Steve hears the commotion, he will come and get her for a timeout in the other room. The most distressing thing is that she will look at me when I’m saying not to do something and give me this grin. It’s as if she wants to tell me to talk all I want but she is going to do what she likes. It makes me feel impotent as a parent.
That’s not to say Jaida doesn’t understand when she is misbehaving. Last Friday after she punched the hole through the screen door, she asked mom, “Nana, why’d I punched a hole in that screen?” Almost like someone with a personality disorder even she can’t understand why she behaves the way she does sometimes. It’s like she gets a thought in her head and the rest of the world is tuned out. If she’s trying to take something from Jarod that he shouldn’t have but I’m yelling for her to let him have it (because I don’t want to hear him screaming), she acts like she doesn’t hear a word I’m saying. All of her attention is focused on doing what I'm telling her not to do.
Jarod’s Expanding Vocabulary
Some of Jarod’s latest words are: nemonade (lemonade), laliss (glasses) and Jed-ya (Jaida). He likes to ask questions and he will wait patiently for the answers. His favorite word is ‘why’ and we often hear that word during the day. Sometimes after he asks why and we explain, he will say “Oh.” I think he really understands what we tell him. I met with his social worker on Wednesday to do a six month review of his IFSP, or Individual Family Service Plan. It’s similar to an IEP but it covers his early intervention services.
Beth, his therapist, thinks he may not qualify for services anymore. There has to be a 25% delay in his overall speech and we are both thinking he won’t fall into that category. Teresa, his social worker, doesn’t think he is at age level yet (like Beth told me). But she doesn’t see him every week like Beth does. During her visit, Jarod was climbing all over her and trying to get into her purse. She said, “This is the most animated I’ve ever seen him!” I told her that was because he was on his home turf. During his feeding clinic visits, he sits in the chair being quiet yet alert. He only makes eye contact with some of the people and keeps one eye on Terry at all times. I told Teresa that Jarod was probably afraid of Terry and she laughed. “That could be true because some adults are scared of her too.” We had a good laugh and then we finished Jarod’s review.
Hair Disaster and Preparing for Lambchop (Again!)
After Teresa left I went to get my hair cut. I really can’t say this any other way except, I HATE it! I wanted something cute, short and low maintenance. What I got is something that resembles a bad wig. Maybe after I set it on smaller rollers it will take some type of shape but I don’t know. I promise to take a picture and add it to Lambchop’s website. The new USB cable for my digital should be here by Monday or Tuesday of next week so check our site for the new pics then.
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/t/threescompany
I also have two versions of his crib to post too. One is with the bedding that I got when I was pg with Jaida that I also used for Jarod. The other is with some bedding I got from Pottery Barn Kids that matches Jarod’s bedding a little more. Jarod has a patchwork transportation theme and the PBK stuff has patchwork tugboats on the bumper. I got a solid sheet and dust ruffle to go with it. I originally wanted something sophisticated and gender neutral. I just couldn’t pay the prices that I found though. There was one set at Baby Depot by BananaFish called Sunday in the Park. It was beige, mauve, mint green and dark green in various plaids and toile, but it was $199! I put the old bedding I already had on the crib and I felt it just didn’t go with the rest of the room. So, I ordered the PBK stuff and I’m happy with it. I think.
Update on Jaida’s Public School Adventure
On Tuesday I met with a rep from the special ed department, along with Suzanne and a general ed kindergarten teacher. As it turns out, the GARS I had filled out with Suzanne wasn’t even necessary. The SE rep looked at all the documentation I had brought and said the classification could be changed. I know some people might think I’m putting a label on Jaida but let me explain how this messed up system works. Under the speech or developmental delay classification, Jaida would be declared ineligible for services once she met the goals in her IEP. Under the autism classification, she will be eligible for any services she needs until she is out of the public school system. The SE rep almost apologized to me. As we were finishing the paperwork she said, “I hope this has been a better experience for you than dealing with the preschool program.” I told her it had.
We also did the transportation paperwork in case I decide after the baby comes that I might want her to ride the bus to or from school. The IEP she has will stay as it is since it can be modified once school starts if the need arises. She will continue to get speech services at her new school from the therapist that serves that school. Suzanne is sad that she won’t be seeing Jaida anymore and she has talked about going to visit her at her new school. It looks as if everything is finally coming together for Jaida. The attorney I consulted told me she didn’t think I had anything to litigate and her advice was to accept the offer of reimbursement for the therapy costs. Legally, the SE director was right about the course of events and what I was entitled to. I hope to get that check any day now so I can start planning for my maternity leave. I don’t want to go back to work before January if I can help it.
Pregnancy Stupidity
I have to include the following anecdote just to make sure it is documented for the future. We’ve had digital cable with one particular company since before it was the hot new thing. As a result, our bill was dirt cheap as far as prices go now to get the channels we had. I wanted a high-speed internet connection too but my MIL was told by cable company X that it was not available here. Okay, so three years later I call and tell customer service what my MIL told me and ask if high-speed internet is available in our area now. The rep’s answer was, “Well, if they told you that then, it’s probably still that way.” What?! That answer combined with the slow but steady increase in our monthly bill sent me looking elsewhere for alternatives.
So I go to cable company Y’s website and find out they offer HS internet in my area and I get a discount if I combine services. I call and ask a few questions but not the important ones. Such as, “What channels will I actually get?” Instead I get all giddy and excited about the prospect of being able to talk on the phone and surf the net at the same time. Imagine! I sign up and they come out the very next day to hook us up. Last night, Steve (king of the remote) is flipping through the channels and he informs me that we have no premium channels. No HBO, no Cinemax, no Showtime, not even Starz. Oh, the horror. I immediately call Company Y’s customer service. I’m sure you can guess what happened next.
To make a long, painful story short, I probably pay more for this friggin’ cable now than I did before. I did get high-speed internet so maybe it’s not a total write-off. Even with the so-called discount I still got shafted. Ha-rumphhh! I added the premium channels (as many as they could give me, so Steve would get off my back), but they can’t come back and fix it until Tuesday. Maybe. What kills me is that getting it turned on and switched was almost too easy. I feel so violated. What can I say? I’m not all there these days. Some pregnant women should not be allowed to make any decisions due to temporary insanity. Oh well, I’m sure you are snoring by now.
This, That and the Other
Is it possible to get varicose veins in your groin? I think I may have the world’s first case. Just like my other two pregnancies, my pelvis is separating in front. My bed is high and lifting my leg to get into it makes me hold my breath. Is there a brace you can get for that?
Every time Jaida sees me with a piece of baby paraphernalia she asks, “Is that for your baby?” I just tell her it’s for our baby. I don’t want her to think that the baby will be just mine although it may seem like it at first. I also have a habit of removing my pants and parading around the house that way in the evenings. Jaida will say, “Mommy, why you take your pants off?” I tell her they make my stomach itchy. Then she says, “Is it hurting your baby?” I tell her no but the pants bother my stomach. She can be incredibly sympathetic at times and bossy at others. If I don’t eat what she thinks is enough she will say, “Mommy you meed to make a happy plate, so your baby can grow.”
Now that the crib is fully outfitted again, Jarod has been trying to climb into it. That can’t be a good sign. I hope he is over that stage by the time the baby gets here. Otherwise there may be two little boys in the crib.
This has certainly turned into a bumbling and disjointed entry so I will end now. Besides, this chair is killing my tailbone and I need to go make nice with the husband to soothe his cable withdrawal.
Until next time,
Kim, Jaida, Jarod & Lambchop
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