 | Diary Navigation:
|
December 31, 2002
JAROD’S THERAPY PROGRESS (12/31/02)
As far as OT goes, we got a real lecture from Jennifer yesterday. I told her Jarod had stopped drinking Pediasure cold turkey and she frowned. Then when I told her he was only eating corn chips and popcorn, she sighed and shook her head. I told her Steve and I had been taking turns feeding him and we were holding firm. She took him back to the therapy room on a Radio Flyer tricycle with a rope on the front. A little later, she asked the receptionist to send me back there. She had Jarod strapped into the feeding chair and she was using candy as a bribe. Since Jarod prefers strong or intense flavors, she let him have a bite of a Sour Patch Kid between bites of the food I brought. He was doing very well and she got him to eat seven bites to every one of the candy.
Jennifer told me that Jarod’s willingness to eat or not eat was all about control and manipulation. I really knew that but I just listened quietly. Our new regimen before all meals (yeah, right) is some type of motion activity like swinging or bouncing on a ball. Then we have to use whatever bribe or food he’s fixated on at the moment to coerce him into eating at least one bite. The goal is to get him to eat as many bites as we can with as few of the reward bites as possible. Steve has really taken on the bulk of this work since I have little patience for struggling with Jarod. In all honesty, I’m sure Jarod knows this and he likes to prove his power by holding out. The child is stubborn and he got that trait honestly. Lately, when he gets angry he bites the furniture to vent his frustration. I only hope he can express himself soon and stop manipulating us for fun.
Beth came today and Jarod said at least 10 words while she was here. He said “lello” (jello), way-way (rain), li lone (turn the light on), boon (spoon) and off just to name a few. He pointed to the correct objects when Beth asked him to and he repeated moo and cow when we looked at the Chick-Fil-A cow calendar. When she took out her blocks and stacked the first one, she said ‘one’ out loud. To my utter shock, Jarod stacked the next one and plain as day said, “Two.” I know my eyes had to be bulging out of my head since Beth looked at me twice. I didn’t know what to say. I managed to tell her that I’d never heard him say that. Jaida was here since her school is still out and she was a moderate distraction. She kept answering Beth’s questions instead of letting Jarod do it. I tried to talk her into watching TV in my room, but she wanted to stick around and bug us. Beth knew she would be here so she was very accommodating. She even gave Jaida a sticker too for being a good helper.
THE NEXT STEP IN JAIDA’S JOURNEY & MY SPIRITUALTY
I realize now that I’ve never described the behavior that makes life so difficult with Jaida. She has a way of doing everything and nothing all at once. She reminds of the Tasmanian devil on Looney Tunes with her flurry of fruitless activity. She rides the arms of the furniture, dumps out the toy bin, takes Jarod’s toys and talks back when I ask her to stop. All in a span of five minutes. She touches me on my breasts (sometimes in public) and tries to grab Jarod’s private areas despite my explanations of how other people’s bodies are off limits in that way. She runs and laughs and finds humor in all things inappropriate. If I ask her to stop saying breast or butt, she thinks it’s the most hilarious thing in the world to keep saying it. Usually around 6:00 every night, her peals of laughter and escalating antics have frayed my nerves to shreds. When bedtime finally comes, I don’t know whether to laugh or cry myself.
Having time off has confirmed my feelings that there needs to be some intervention where her behavior is concerned. What happens when she gets to puberty? The lack of understanding about personal space and appropriate affection is a nightmare waiting to happen. I have no idea what the future holds for Jaida, but I feel it is my duty to make sure she is as well prepared as possible. I was going to address all this with the school system when (make that if) we have another IEP meeting but I’m not optimistic. As I thought of the recent events these last two weeks, I made my decision. I reached my breaking point two nights ago and I let my fingers do the walking through the psychology section of the yellow pages. I’m about to get spiritual on you, so if reading about a religious testimony disturbs you then skip this next part.
I feel that I have a real connection with God. I feel as though he speaks to me but I don’t mean in a ‘burning bush’ kind of way. It’s hard to put into words, but sometimes I just know when something is right or I’m making the right decision. A year ago, I made an appointment at the same place I called yesterday. For some reason, I canceled the appointment and never gave it another thought. The only reason I can think of is maybe it wasn’t the right time. I read all the ads in the yellow pages yesterday afternoon and I kept coming back to this one place. The kids were taking their naps and the house was quiet. I kept looking at the phone number I had scribbled on my notepad and trying to form an intelligent spiel in my head. I said a quick silent prayer before I dialed the number and asked God to help me get this taken care of and guide me in the right direction.
When the receptionist answered, I started talking fast to get over my nervousness. Hello, I’d like to make an appointment for my daughter.” She asked if she had been there before and I said no. It kills me how they always ask what insurance you have before they even schedule you. Anyway, I was instructed to have my insurance card ready before she transferred me to the right person. I have all the numbers on my card memorized (from constant paperwork) so I didn’t bother to get my wallet. I was asked for my contract number and they put me on hold again to see what benefits we qualified for. When she came back, she gave me my estimated co-pay amounts and waited to see if I was ready to proceed. I told her that I was and then gave a brief description of my concerns and lo and behold, she said there was a 1:45 available for tomorrow! I got chills as I accepted the slot and sat back in my chair. I felt the supernatural wheels of change being set into motion.
I gathered all the copies of my evaluation reports and made sure I had everything I thought I might need. There was a bit of chaos here at the last minute and we were five minutes late. We waited for quite a while and finally a middle aged man called Jaida’s name and we followed him to his office. He introduced himself as Dr. M, took a history and asked about what brought us there. We talked for a few minutes about the main behavior problems and then he said he wanted us to talk with the psychiatrist of the practice. We waited some more and Dr. M showed us into Dr. H’s office. I repeated my reasons for coming and he looked over the reports where Dr. M had highlighted in some areas.
Dr. H sat back in his big leather chair and asked what I knew about autism. I thought for a moment before I answered his trick question. I said, “Well, I know enough to know that I don’t know everything. My understanding is that her type of autism means she has enough characteristics to fall under the umbrella of autism, but not enough to be truly autistic.” Dr. H looked up at the ceiling and pursed his lips. “Well,” he began slowly, “The main thing is that these children lack the ability to bond socially and learn the rules of social interaction.” I nodded as he continued. “We can certainly help you, but I think you need to meet Dr. J. He has more experience is this area and he could tell us where to start. Before we can work on behavior modification, we need to determine what intelligence level she’s functioning at. Has she ever had any IQ testing done?” I answered no. “Then that should be our first step. Let me see if Dr. J is in with anyone right now,” he rose from his massive chair and left the room.
Dr. M told me, “I’m never disappointed when I consult Dr. H. He confirmed what I was thinking and this is definitely out of my range of experience. I can’t say we won’t see each other again, but Dr. J is our clinical psychologist and resident expert in this field.” Just then Dr. H came back with Dr. J and we exchanged pleasantries. Dr. J said, “I saw you in the waiting room and she waved at me.” I hadn’t even noticed that she did, that’s typical Jaida though. Dr. H summarized the history and told Dr. J what we had discussed. When they got to Roan’s report, Dr. J asked about her speech and general comprehension. I told him that Roan and I believed Jaida had a photographic memory because she recognizes so many words and repeats answers she’s heard other people give to the same questions. He just nodded and made notes.
We said goodbye and I scheduled the test appointment and a follow up with Dr. J for next week. I suddenly had the feeling that answers were about to be revealed to me and I was making the right choice. It was a very peaceful feeling. All the doctors seemed to understand what I was trying to tell them and I was not made to feel overly concerned or irrational at all during the entire visit. Another thing that made me feel this way was something that happened during my facial last Friday.
The aesthetician was asking about my skin care regimen and giving me suggestions. She had to skip the facial massage because of all the acne extractions she had to do so she massaged my arms and shoulders for twice as long. She kept asking, during the massage, if I had been doing anything different to cause so much skin irritation. Then I felt like telling her my story and I opened up. I told her about the stress I’ve been under, Jaida’s diagnosis and Jarod’s problems. I poured it all out and it felt so good. I felt so light after I finished talking. After I told her about the school system, she said, “I bet you pray a lot.” That struck me as odd because it is not PC to talk religion these days, and even though the South is immune to that rule strangers don’t usually ask me that sort of thing. But I answered, “Constantly.” I told her about Jaida’s Montessori school and how much it had helped her. Then she said something that made me want to sit bolt upright.
She asked how I found the school and I said, “I don’t know, I saw the ads on TV and in a local parenting magazine and I just thought it would be great for her.” She said, “You know what I think? I think God led you to that place.” I almost burst into tears. Her words went into the core of my soul and I felt flushed and tingly. I never looked at it that way before. I couldn’t say anything for a minute. Finally, I told her, “I think you’re right.” She shared a story with me about a friend that lived in the next county. Her friend’s son has ADHD and they had similar struggles to get him services. She offered me encouragement and told me how blessed Jaida and Jarod were to have me for their mom. I felt her sincerity and I knew she had been purposely put in my path that day. She expressed her regret over not being able to pamper me longer and we laughed. She told me I deserved it on a regular basis and that I should do something nice for myself more often.
We parted in the lobby after she showed me some products to try and I had a strange feeling that I may never see her again when I go back. I left her a 20% tip and walked outside feeling more relaxed then I’ve been in months. I was practically floating. My soul was truly happy and calm. I’m thinking 2003 will be a year filled with more revelations than ever before.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Kim, Jaida & Jarod
 |  |
|
want to keep a diary on iParenting?
Authoring a diary on the iParenting network allows you to chronicle your family's story, preserving it for years to come. It's also a great way to get the most out of the iParenting community. Click here to start...
|
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families. 
